Breaking Up (Gently) with my Phone

My husband often says there are three of us in our relationship. Before you panic, let me reassure you – it’s not that kind of story.

The third party is my mobile phone, and I am, by my own admission, deeply attached to it. If I put it down and can’t find it: panic. If the Wi-Fi or mobile data goes on the blink: panic. If I drop it and my apps refuse to open: full-blown existential crisis.

And yet, there was a time when I didn’t have a mobile at all.

I would head out for the day with no way to contact anyone instantly – and no way for anyone to contact me. No WhatsApp. No texts. No “Running 10 mins late x”. No location sharing. No live updates. I even backpacked around the world for a year like this – postcards doing most of the heavy lifting. Radical, I know.

And you know what? It was fine. More than fine, actually. It was calmer. Simpler. Quieter.

So over the past few months, I’ve been trying something new. Instead of treating my iPhone like an extra limb, I’ve started creating a little distance. An hour before bed, I disconnect from the Wi-Fi and mobile data – and don’t reconnect again until an hour after I wake up. My thinking is simple: if someone really needs to get hold of me, they can still call me. And the impact on my mental health has been enormous.

Mornings without the madness. Now, when I wake up, the first thing I do is open the windows and look up at the sky – not reach for my mobile, dive headfirst into messages, news, social media and the emotional rollercoaster of the internet. I make breakfast. I shower. I find my centre. I create a sense of calm before the day gets loud. 

And the result? I’m calmer throughout the day, too. 

And there’s a physiological reason for this. When we overstimulate ourselves first thing in the morning, we trigger the Sympathetic Nervous System – the fight-or-flight response – cortisol and adrenaline spike – setting ourselves up for yet another day of stress and overreaction. And, it’s not a great way to start the day.

Tuning In. Plus, now, when I’m out for lunch with a friend, going for a walk, or even just sitting on the sofa with my husband watching TV, I’ve been disconnecting as well. No half-listening. No distracted watching. No waiting for that little flash of a WhatsApp notification that must be read immediately. No glancing down to see what Meta thinks I should be buying. Instead, just being there, fully present. A surprisingly novel concept indeed. 

What changed? The difference these small shifts have made has been astonishing. I feel happier. More grounded. More productive. I’ve started to notice the little things again – especially in Nature – a beautiful sky, the sun on my face, a single flower quietly doing its thing. And honestly? These moments feel far more important than keeping up with what politicians or celebrities are doing at any given second. There is a time and a place for the noise – it just isn’t 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

So maybe give it a go. Disconnect a little. Breathe a little more. 

You might be surprised by what you find in the space.

Growing Well with Lady Muck Style

By Catherine Saunders  /  Read more at www.ladymuck.style