When we’re young, if we’re not in a classroom, we’re probably out doing something with our mates. As we get older, however, work and family commitments can mean that those friendship-based meetups slow to a yearly trickle of meeting up for drinks in the rare moments we can manage.
These meets serve the double purpose of giving us time to kick back and enjoy good company. But, have you ever considered that only meeting up for drinks could be standing in the way of your friendships?
In this article, we’ll consider why that might be, and which arrangements could serve to sustain your adult friendships a little more effectively (and regularly).
# 1: The Limitations of a Loud Environment
Bars might be buzzy places to have fun, but they’re also typically filled with loud music and chatter. This can result in stilted conversations that make friendship meets more awkward and limiting than they need to be. After all, if you don’t see one another often, you’ll have a lot to catch up on. If you can’t reasonably have those long conversations, then you could quickly start falling out of one another’s lives.
Quieter environments tend to be better suited to the deep conversations necessary for keeping friendships strong. Something as simple as meeting for a walk could provide dedicated conversation time. Equally, meeting at each other’s houses would be both easier to manage and better suited to long conversations.
# 2 – A Lack of Teamwork
Relationships work best when you work well together. This is partly why friends mean so much to us when we’re young – they’re helping us to navigate the trials of teendom. By comparison, meeting an adult friend for drinks is a low-stakes option that allows you both to present your best faces without necessarily knowing one another that well anymore.
Choosing to tackle some kind of challenge together will be far better for ensuring ongoing closeness, and authenticity. Nowadays, options like tackling an escape room together can be great for this purpose, as it’ll knock down your walls and re-establish why you worked so well together in the first place.
Equally, something as simple as navigating public transport together as you head to a gig out of town can provide crucial bonding that you simply won’t get in a bar.
# 3 – Limited Availability
If you’re only ever meeting friends in a bar, then you’ll probably be limited to meeting on nights when you’re both off work the following day. This can stand in the way of getting together, and it’s an issue you can overcome by taking alcohol off the table.
Alternatives like meeting for a meal are far more achievable, and needn’t take any more than a couple of hours. Even online gatherings are a great option nowadays and could become a regular part of your routine to ensure more regular connections with even your long-distance adult friends.
Are you worried that only ever meeting for a drink might be holding your adult friendships back? It might be time to try some alternatives.
